Witch, Please. Get a Warrant.™ Halloween Doormat
$42.99
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Witch, please. Get a warrant.
Keep the tricks, treats, and questionable surveillance off the porch.
This Halloween doormat combines spooky season with a little privacy attitude. Featuring a witch, surveillance camera, jack-o'-lanterns, and the unmistakable message “WITCH, PLEASE. GET A WARRANT.”, it's made for anyone who likes their Halloween decorations funny, irreverent, and just a little constitutional.
Made from natural coir coconut fiber, this sturdy doormat helps brush dirt from shoes while giving guests—and anyone else watching—the message before they even knock.
Your purchase helps support Help Solve The Case’s independent case review, public education, and selected pro bono investigative work
• Grade A tufted coir coconut fiber
• 24″ × 16″ (61 cm × 40.6 cm)
• 0.59″ (1.5 cm) thick
• Best suited for a protected outdoor area
• Halloween seasonal design
Perfect for: Halloween decorating, front porches, privacy advocates, constitutional-law nerds, attorneys, investigators, and anyone who believes spooky season still requires probable cause.
Decorative humor. No actual warrant required to admire the doormat.
• Grade A tufted coir coconut fiber
• 24″ × 16″ (61 cm × 40.6 cm)
• Thickness: 0.59″ (1.5 cm)
• Black vinyl backing for added stability
• Suitable for covered outdoor areas
• Blank product sourced from China
Disclaimer: Use in a covered, weather-protected area. Avoid direct sunlight and excess moisture. Some natural fiber shedding is normal — just shake the mat to remove loose fibers.
Witch, Please. Get a Warrant.™ Halloween Doormat
$42.99
Keep the tricks, treats, and questionable surveillance off the porch.
This Halloween doormat combines spooky season with a little privacy attitude. Featuring a witch, surveillance camera, jack-o'-lanterns, and the unmistakable message “WITCH, PLEASE. GET A WARRANT.”, it's made for anyone who likes their Halloween decorations funny, irreverent, and just a little constitutional.
Made from natural coir coconut fiber, this sturdy doormat helps brush dirt from shoes while giving guests—and anyone else watching—the message before they even knock.
Your purchase helps support Help Solve The Case’s independent case review, public education, and selected pro bono investigative work
• Grade A tufted coir coconut fiber
• 24″ × 16″ (61 cm × 40.6 cm)
• 0.59″ (1.5 cm) thick
• Best suited for a protected outdoor area
• Halloween seasonal design
Perfect for: Halloween decorating, front porches, privacy advocates, constitutional-law nerds, attorneys, investigators, and anyone who believes spooky season still requires probable cause.
Decorative humor. No actual warrant required to admire the doormat.
• Grade A tufted coir coconut fiber
• 24″ × 16″ (61 cm × 40.6 cm)
• Thickness: 0.59″ (1.5 cm)
• Black vinyl backing for added stability
• Suitable for covered outdoor areas
• Blank product sourced from China
Disclaimer: Use in a covered, weather-protected area. Avoid direct sunlight and excess moisture. Some natural fiber shedding is normal — just shake the mat to remove loose fibers.